ok so i used to be "normal" sized. i mean i wasn't bad i was about 125 lbs, but i wanted to slim down. i was so good! i dropped so much weight so fast! but then i got so good at it i couldn't stop partly because i was so afraid that if i ate anything i would gain it all back. i got down to about 80 lbs and that's when they took me to the hospital and psychiatrist and stuff. i was forced to gain weight. and they just wouldn't stop pushing me and watching me. finally i became so depressed that i ate just to please everyone. i gained it all back and then some. i am now 140 lbs. people say i don't look like it because it's almost all muscle but i know that i look like a giant-fata$$-elephant. i have been telling myself that i need to lose weight and i'll try to motivate myself but it seems so futile, that i just give up. i need to force myself to be skinnier!!! please please please help me!!! if i ever want to be pretty again (esp for him) i need to drop at least 30 lbs! ...and fast! but i'm in college and we don't have kitchens and so we are forced to eat at the HC in front of everyone! and i hate the comments i get when i only eat salad. but i need to lose weight! i feel like i'm just gaining it! my roommates are all so thin! two of them are ballerinas and it just isn't fair! and so the room has a candy bowl and shelves full of junkfood! i need to lose weight so badly but it's so hard and so i'm here for advice and support! and you can keep your mind preoccupied trying to help me succeed, so please help me!
does anyone know any thermogenics or anything that work really well?